a moment along three and a half million years. 38 m + 15 m

i get off the phone with kaiser permanente's billing person. hwubby says, wow, your phone manner has really transformed, it's magnificent.

to give myself credit where credit is due, i really do well. firstly, i notice i'm not getting upset about the errors i spotted. i hold fast to the understanding that the billing person is just doing her job and has an inner self just as i have mine. secondly i watch my breath come in and go out at a easeful pace, and so my voice is infused with this tone of clarity and cheerfulness. lastly but not least, before i dial the number i say to myself, suk wah, remember what you see on nova, they discover this almost-human skull that is three and a half million years old, so stay in the moment with the task at hand but keep a perspective of where it is in the timeline of human history.

aaahhh. it is a pile of bills that i have to take care of with focused attention but bills they are. no more. no less. the outcome does not diminish nor add to my inner self. ayer asher ayer. i am that i am. i will be what i will be. i shall be what i shall be. i step up to what i am being called upon to do. and do it. whatever it is.

so how can the phone conversation with the medical billing specialist not be a pleasant experience?! in the three and a half million year scheme of view, taking care of medical bills and leading enslaved people out of narrow consciousness are fundamentally about taking care of what is necessary in the moment.