Thursday, September 22, 2011

screwing up? not so.

right off the bat let me offer healing prayers for the person who was injured. having done that i can praise the awesomeness of the workings of grace. so there i am mixing up about the session time in apple store. somehow i am just filled with the 'conviction' that it is eleven. check ical? the thought never comes to me. forgetfulness, right? turns out my session is noon. the long and short of it is i get onto the homeward shuttle after the session. the driver starts talking about a shooting. it happened on the road where i usually go through to take the shuttle. now the middle section is all roped off. i have to go all the way around in order to get home. as i walk under the midday sun a bright sound comes up in me. eleven. i know exactly what it means. the next day i knock on the door of my neighbor, ms williams, who knows everything in the neighborhood. i ask her, well, of course i first ask her if anybody is hurt, and yes, someone is still in the hospital for that, and then, i ask her, when did it happen. need i repeat what she said? of course i do. eleven in the morning, she says. i would have left at eleven for a session scheduled at noon and i would have run right into the whole episode. how about a big round of applause for the incredible intelligence of my great self and how far i have come in terms of listening to the promptings of grace. really. i didn't screw up. i was following the voice of my great self. wow.

then i recall these words of my guru.
while grace is penetrating deeply
i say to myself
people say grace is a shelter
why, then, am i losing all i have?

screwing up? losing all i have? on the path to knowing the self, living in the self, everything is an opportunity to deepen and strength my connection to my own true nature.

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