i can sit cross-legged again. yay.

i never know what awaits me. expectation of outcome does nothing but limiting myself. case in point. i have to go through a sleepless night. so soon after midnight and the initial moments of dread i say to myself, i can't fall asleep anyway, i might as well go to meditate. so i do. i go to sit down on the chair on which i have been sitting for formal meditation for more than a week because of the sprained foot. somehow on this night i just feel so much discomforts in the foot while sitting in the chair that i say to myself, what the heck, i'll just try sitting on the floor. so i do. guess what? the sprained foot feels just fine in the cross-legged position. just like that i am ecstatic. i can meditate cross-legged again. this is so great. i am so happy about it. really, who knew what something apparently unpleasant could turn out to be so fantastic.

forgetting is the root of suffering

i have such a new-found appreciation for what the body has been tirelessly and quietly doing for me, supporting me and holding me up. how so? with a sprained right foot i can only sit cross-legged for a short while before the discomfort becomes unbearable. i realize i take so much for granted when everything in the body work well. in another word i forget. from now on when i meditate i will first thank the body for serving me so loyally, for being such a reliable companion on my spiritual journey. without the body i can't meditate, i can't chant, i can't study scriptures, i can't be in the sweetness of my own inner self. forgetting is truly the root of suffering.